We experience mini-deaths each and every day. Like normal death, it is the cessation of something once thought to be continuous. The death of a relationship, an object, a job, a workshop, etc. We experience death everyday and it is hardly noticed because it is not extraordinary. These deaths are mundane and uninteresting which makes the act of an individual dying that much more significant. It is easy to accept these little deaths because we choose to actively forget the path we were following before and instead, follow the new path that no longer has the dead as a part of it. It is forgotten and we evolve without it. Mini-death is no small matter however, we are re-training our brains to live without that which we thought we could never be without. They help shape us and get us to where we are today, all while subconsciously preparing ourselves for the grand acts; and by that I mean individual deaths. Mini-deaths are just as a much a part of life as regular deaths. Have you experienced a mini-death lately?
There once was a man who knew nothing. He knew not where he was nor where he had been. “How strange” thought the man, “to be nowhere and see nothing.”
The man was not concerned, for though he saw nothing he felt he was content.
Complete and content.
The man sighed.
He may not know anything but he knew he could still think.
“Thinking’s as much as anyone’s got I suppose,” said the man, very aware he was speaking only to himself.
How much time had passed?
The man did not know but he wondered and pondered.
“If I could only figure out where I am”, the man said to himself at last, “then I might know which way to go.”
The man could go up, he could go down.
The man could go left and the man could go right.
There was still nothing.
A white abyss that sprawled endlessly.
He did not understand and he no longer felt content.
He could not remember if he had done something to put himself there.
He couldn’t remember anything in fact.
He tried and tried but not a single memory came to him.
“I can’t even remember my own name!” the man yelled out to nobody.
Frustrated the man sat down and began to cry.
Great heaving sobs for himself and for that which he could not remember.
His sobs echoed around him and purgatory whispered back,
“you are home.”
I suppose a good place to start is with a question I will never tire of hearing, “Why did you choose funeral service?” My answers have changed with time and I’m sure they will continue to do so. However, my interest in the macabre started at a very young age. Spending much of my time up in Massachusetts, I was always surrounded by nature and spent much of my time outdoors. This resulted in my finding of numerous “treasures”; a baby mink here, a dead frog or bird there. My Grandfather was always very supportive of my curiosities. I once asked if I could set a dead frog I found on fire and he told me to keep it away from the house. Needless to say, I thought my Grandfather was the coolest guy around. He let me do what I will and a slow fascination began for myself about what happens after we die.
It’s easy to believe what your family or community tells you about the death subject; especially when that is what they practice and is what is readily available for information. Luckily for me, while there were few who held firm to their beliefs and ideals, none were forced on me. I grew up with my own ideas and thoughts and eventually settled to where I am today. I am spiritual, but I believe in Mother Nature. I believe in the wind, and the tides, the moon, and the sun. I believe we were created from stardust and we will return to the earth and fertilize new growth as we were meant to. However, I respect and honor those of all religions and beliefs. I find there is beauty in anything and everything worshiped.
I decided to get into this business not only because it is what has always fascinated and intrigued me, but also because of what I can learn and build on in many areas. I have only cracked a few religions on the surface, while most of that knowledge lends to the funeral tie-in, but I hope to learn more. It is a beautiful thing when someone decides to believe in something, and it can be magical when others choose not to discredit or bash those beliefs but instead honor and embrace them. We are all people, regardless of physical or spiritual attributes; we all deserve to be treated as such, and that starts with understanding.