Time

Has flown by and you are so much bigger now.

Always growing and adapting, accepting the changes and flowing with them.

You are the epitome of magnificence and grace.

Smart and beautiful, strong enough to move oceans and earth.

Out in the world I have sent you and though I do worry and fret,

my dear daughter, you can conquer the world.

I did a beautiful thing

I learned to let go.

I have been holding on to so much doubt and instability.

I finally said no to it, I won’t allow it to hurt me anymore.

I let it go.

In doing so, I feel less pressure, I feel lighter.

I feel better.

And that’s what I’m here to do.

To whoever reads this; it takes small steps, but be proud of them, they’re progress.

SS

Recently

I have found myself to be completely infuriated at my lack of motivation to do anything. I know I’ve hit the depressive side of things in my bipolar disorder when I feel sluggish. The only good thing that I can say is coming out of it is my ability to complete my “tasks” throughout the day. I am still doing what needs to be done but I just feel so blah and empty about all of it and that makes me more depressed. It’s a vicious cycle and I’m trying to climb out of it. I hope whoever is reading this is coming out on top of things that they are struggling with and I wish you luck.

SS

Never Enough Time

Time is a concept; a construct.

Irrelevant and yet still pressing.

We all have a finite amount of time and what we choose to do with it is what defines us.

We all live so differently and yet, somehow the same.

Afraid to die, afraid of time.

Not enough time.

Never enough time.

Not to do the things we really want to.

Instead we are conditioned to do the will of others.

Conditioned to spend our time as slaves.

But there are those that have beguiled their way into better time spent.

Sweet release of the chains and living freely, unashamed and unpressed for time.

I wish to be one, are you?

Sunrise

Swirling and whirling,

the dust rises and falls.

Birds sing in their high perches,

watching over the world as it awakens from its slumber.

The sun greets the day like an old friend,

enveloped in warmth and joy.

For this new day brings new life,

new death,

new beginnings,

and new ends.

A timeless tale of a sunrise.

Stale and Stagnant

Stale and stagnant are those who do nothing,

those who dare not to dream.

Those who desire not to achieve but to wade the waters,

waiting for something to float its way.

Half finished hopes and dreams lay broken at the feet,

all too mendable but will not be.

They are they broken promises,

the same old results.

The same old defeat.

Tomorrow is a new day,

filled with the same stale waters.

Slumber

Floating in a sea of blue,

grey days have come to pass.

Sunshine feels unreal, exquisite on the skin.

Feels like I’ve missed too many days,

slumbering in my depression.

Like a choke hold, only smothered and pressed.

No release until it passed,

now I’m floating in a sea of blue.

Positive Attracts Positive

I read something by another blogger about happiness. A few key points they pointed out were ideas like:

negative attracts negative

positive attracts positive

space from those who are negative is crucial while we focus on those who are more positive-minded

allowing us to stay true to ourselves

being able to express our negativity and finding the positive, because it is there, we just have to find it

I really liked the piece because it hit home for me. I have been in such a dark and crucial point in my life where I feel I’m only now, and very slowly, starting to crawl out of it. I focus too much on the negativity in my life and it seems everything is all wrong at once, when in reality there is an equal list of things going right that are being brushed to the side and forgotten.

It’s a small list, but it is an extremely attainable goal for now.

Do you have anything you’re currently working on? I’d love to know so leave me a comment.

High

Hazy and dazed,

helpless and hopeless.

Down and out,

counted out.

Means of self destruction,

think think think.

Starry and glazed,

dew drops on the blades.

It’s easier to wallow in one’s self doubt.